The wishlist of an Indian citizen

A genie comes and grants three wishes to the Indian citizen. The common Indian citizen who travels in crowded trains and buses that stink badly. He bears the brunt of strikes and dharnas. He is the brave soul who might have to bear Rahul Gandhi as the future Prime Minister. The man watches Salman Khan roam scot-free and Sanjay Dutt always on a parole. He, who lives in a small 2 bhk apartment with his unmarried daughter. The man with as many problems as his age, what would be on his wish list?

1^st wish

Common Man: I want loads of money.

Genie: Sure man, but I need a little time.

Common Man (sighs): Why so?

Genie: I have a plan for you that will keep you wealthy always.

Common Man: Oh! And the plan is?

Genie: It’s a 5 point plan. Firstly, I will do away with the taxes this country levies on you. There will only be a 2 per cent levy per receipt in bank accounts. Secondly, I will reduce the current inflation level so that you get commodities at a cheaper price. Thirdly, I will boost business investments in the country to provide employment to your children and encourage entrepreneurship. Fourthly, I will make sure all cities and villages get uninterrupted water and power supply. Lastly, I will develop ports, bridges, roads etc. so that you travel with ease and at minimum cost.

Common Man: I would be able to keep all of my hard earned money. That is great J. Thanks Genie.

Genie: Come on! It’s just the first wish. Tell me what’s next?

2^nd wish

Common Man: I want the safety of my wife and children.

Genie: Certainly Man. I would grant it to you.

Common Man: How will you be able to protect them 24*7?

Genie: I will ask the CID to train “friends” to protect women and kids.

Common Man (Shrugs): Seriously, you mean my friends?

Genie (laughs): No by friends I mean undercover operatives trained by the CID on issues relating to harassment of women and children. So in offices, buses and even your neighbor’s house, the person next to you could be a CID operative. These operatives will not only be the eyes and ears of CID but also field officers geared to catch nuisance mongers.

Common Man: I am totally impressed by your ways Genie J.

Genie: Your wish is my command dear. Tell me what is your third and last wish?

Third Wish

Common Man: I want 30 more wishes :P

Genie: Yeah I kind of guessed this was coming. Don’t worry I will fulfill all your wishes. You just have to keep the Lotus, I emerged from, with you always and I will keep on serving you. I have served the people of Gujarat and they seem pretty happy and satisfied and I hope the same for you too.

Common Man: Yes Genie I will. If only the hand-broom stopped throwing all the dirt on you, I would have found you much earlier. Love you lots Genie.